President Ovadia Harary Bids Hillel A Fairwell

DEAL, NJ -- The end of the year is upon us. With the great Color War over, the Ovadia Administration is packing up its things to depart. The new election season is soon to begin. Many faces, new and old, are making their appearances on the ballot. But before these aspiring politicians take the stage, Ovadia Harary's student council must bid its fairwell to Hillel.

"We had some amazing events this year" Mr. Harary released to the press. "Dodgeball hit a new high this year, with many more students in attendance than last year. But it also had that personal touch, when a certain dark green 'Reebay' ran across the line and started hitting people with the ball -- he thought that was the object of the game."

PresiVadia had a number of people to thank for the successes of his administration. "Joyce Cohen, Lilly Tebele and Nicole Vaknin did a phenomenal job, as did Edward [Benjamin] and Isaac [Sasson]. They were my cabinet, and they were good at being it." The student council of 2012 will be graduating this year. "I also want to extend my greatest thanks to our 'unofficial' student council members: Leon Ebani, Lee Matalon and Ricky Tawil."

"SemiNar comedy was ridiculously good this year thanks to both our official and unofficial members. Ricky did an amazing job with the videos. Lee, as well, produced some A+ work on his videos and skits. They worked countless hours to pull the whole thing together. The StuCo guys put together a great dance; the girls did a great job with all of the behind the scenes things. I could not have wished for a better team for SemiNar."

Ovadia recalls the night before SemiNar, asking the administration "who was doing the Saturday night comedy. They replied, 'we got this guy named Bill, he's great, don't worry.' Turns out he was the biggest goon in history." Dr. Burnout Bill, HyD (Doctor of Hypnosis), was unable to comment.

"Possibly my biggest political achievement was solving Hillel's hunger problem. If you'll notice, the bagels come on time every day. There is always cream cheese. The box and vending machines are overflowing with product." The situation is indeed much better than that of last year, when Hillel did not actually have a Student Council President.

"Lastly, I want to thank everyone who made it possible. Joyce, Nicole, Lilly, Isaac, Edward, Lee, Ricky, Leon, Al -- the list could go on. But for now, I bid you farewell." The president was shortly lifted off by a Lebanese Air Force helicopter.

President Ovadia Harary shuttled away by air